Striving for Independence...

I think I've finally learned the secret to contentment...

I've finally found that one thing that lessons one's worries, creates a peaceful existence, etc... A Self sustaining lifestyle. {I know, I am pretty much the last person to learn this, I learn slower than most I think.} I'd read about this phenomenon, and heard about it, in the way that one hears about rocket launches and moon landings. Distant. Untouched. I'd known no one who had any semblance of this type of life, therefore it became more fairy tale and less possibility.

Then this amazing girl, whom I call a friend though she is technically a friend of a friend, writes these eloquent blog posts about making her own yogurt, cheese, butter, etc... (Does she do her own flour? Probably, but I don't know...) The point is, this very idea sort of rocked my thoughts a little bit. I mean, the truth of it is I don't really want to be making my own dairy products. Then again, though, maybe that's only because I don't know how...

I was awed by how she can pretty much handcraft or grow nearly all that they eat, as I'm newly proud of myself for making crock pot yogurt and homemade granola. How can she do these things, and homeschool her girls? {I have suspicions that there may be super powers at work here, which I'd always believed were also stuff of fairy tales- until now.}

My awe of her ceased, and my envy engulfed me however, Sunday afternoon when we were at the super market. We, as a nation, are getting ourselves into quite a predicament I fear. People losing jobs, cost of necessary things like fuel and food on the rise... A fine line can only be balanced for so long. My husband, thankfully, still has his job- but even at his lower wage and forced time off- we can't afford $150 a week in groceries. It's ridiculous that we should have to. All of this effort and all of this money that's gone to prolong the immaturity help the richer corporates (known as banks and greedy auto manufacturers) has done essentially nothing to help us. To truly help us. Because, at the end of the day, if a bank teller still has a job- or an assembly line worker still gets a paycheck from Ford- what does it matter if they can't even buy their family a loaf of bread?

All i know is, a self sustaining life really is where the secret is. Would it be perfect? No. But the less dependence one has on someone else- the better. It feels completely out of reach and unfeasible but baby steps are something I believe in. So, while I am still eating store bought cheese and sour cream- I am gleefully jumping up and down because my little urban container garden is sprouting!

On a happier note...

I am the girl who loves the deep & insightful, artsy & complex or cleverly scripted & cinematic movies. I love subtitles, when they are necessary. I love vibrant imagery and I watch movies for all of the aesthetics and artsy features as well as the story. To me it's equally as important that music is well placed, make up is believably and wardrobe is authentic...

I am the girl who whispers "they should have researched this better", or more specifically."That waterfall is in Oregon, not Washington, fools." (that's my long overdue nod to Twilight, ya'll. It's been awhile...)

I am the critic.

I am the arthouse film connoisseur.

What I am not is your typical, trendy movie loving girl. I don't get excited about yet another movie about that one last party, on that one last night of high school, with that one girl that you've loved since freshman year. Sorry, if you do. We're cool- I just don't like them.

Sometimes, however, my snobbish ways weaken a bit and I allow a cheesy movie to break into my icy heart and warm me to the bone.

This time around, that movie is 17 Again...

I LOVE IT!!!! The music, the story, the funny. It's funny. It's laugh-out-loud funny. It isn't original, it isn't the most clever film out there- and yet- for me this movie is pretty perfect. I love it...

And Zac Efron... who knew??? (ok. The whole world knew... I just never saw it before. He's adorable AND talented... And here, I just thought people only liked him for his pretty face.)

When in doubt, blame the bees...

It's really hot.

They are calling for thunderstorms tomorrow (one can only hope) and so I decided to sneak out back and pull the blankets from the line that I'd forgotten left to draw in more of that fresh-air-scent- and i was shocked by the temperature. Outside my sweet little house, it has to be AT LEAST 20 degrees cooler.

Minimum.

While inside we roast...

I'd like to take a moment to write to you about the problem with being a night owl... {note how I say this, as though there were only one issue with such a burden! As if incredibly difficult mornings, crawling in to bed hours behind your husband and seldom having a productive second in your day- before noon- were all completely natural and wonderful things...}

So yes- the problem with being a night owl: peanut butter bumble bees.

You see, tomorrow is our homeschool co-op day. For one of our co-op classes, Gen and I were asked to bring these peanut butter bumble bee "cookies". (that are never baked.) The problem was that by the time we had room in our schedule (see= "lack of productivity before noon" and add to this "inability to find my late night pal- motivation") it was far too hot to take on such a task. These globs rolls of peanut butter would never remain as such. It would be one giant, disappointing mess... So we waited until evening. But evening found us finishing what we could, with the garden, before Lost. Lost found us outraged at the dumb recap it was, with the completely lame preview for next weeks super 100th episode- and regardless our house was probably 90+ degrees. (i.o.w. insuitable conditions for bees made of peanut buttery goodness...)

Being the night owl that I am, and ignoring the sweltering temperature in my house at this moment, one could ask why i wasn't delving into the pbbee goodness rather than wasting precious moments on this blog... Well, my friend, I will tell you...

Genny is the bee-keeper/maker of this project. I'm merely at attention to melt chocolate as needed. (perhaps by merely placing it on the counter, at this rate.) Genny, who is asleep right now, is therefore incapable of such bee-utiful acts in that overheating wasteland known as my kitchen...

So... after much blabbering and not yet getting to the point- we come to the dillema of the night owl's cross to bear.

MORNING...

The early hour at which I have to rise, motivate, shower, motivate, wake the princess in her tower, spread cheer and motivation and somehow get the bee's polinated, created and ready to leave the house when we do.

You may ask, at this point, the previous question about why am I on this blog rather than sleeping... BECAUSE I'M A NIGHT OWL... Aren't you paying attention??? (to those of you who weren't wondering- thanks for paying attention. you ARE my favorite readers- you know.)

this is a conundrum... will the bees make it? Will I make it? Will the thunderstorms come? (will they ruin our little garden????)

Tune in next time...

p.s. The husband has granted me permission to load photos on the laptop instead of waiting for the desk top. While ceremony photos are on the desk top (sorry!) and will have to be waited on- I can finally empty my overloaded cameras. perhaps next time will include photos...

The Switch...

What were we thinking???

I mean, really...

There is still no word on the job situation, and we had a weekend of wondering/worrying. So, what do normal people do in times like that? Honestly, I wouldn't have a clue.

As for us? We procrastinate the garden, do up the yard, deep clean the kitchen (nearly killing me in the process from the nasty self-cleaning-oven fumes) and then decide to- (pay CLOSE attention here...)

- move Genny upstairs to the bonus room which is then housed my sewing stuff, craft stuff, our office and our school room.

- therefore moving the office/craft stuff/school stuff into our "guest room" which is maybe one/sixth the size of the bonus room.

- as well as moving the "guest" room (and pluthera of video game storage) into Genny's old room. (old as in, she woke up there yesterday morning...)

Currently my house looks like every nook and cranny vomited books, school supplies, crafting stuff and anything else you can think of- into every room. Not one room is done. Not one room is on the verge of being done- and my living room is destroyed in the process.

When it's done though- Genny's room will be awesome.

Everything else: CRAMPED.

those drama lessons paid off...

as well as her mother's Twilight obsession:

Act 1, Scene 1:

Genny as Bella: I know what you are.

Genny as Edward: Say it. *pause dramatically* Out loud.

Genny as Bella: A Vvvvvampire.

Genny as Edward: As if you could stop me. (Shouting)

As if you could out run me. (Runs around room clumsily)

As if you could fight me off. (Dramatically pulls invisible tree from living room.)

Genny changes expression to a more gentle one.

Genny as Edward: And so the lion fell in love with the lamb.

Genny as Bella: What a stupid lamb.

Genny as Edward: what a sick and infested lion.

Flash to death scene:

Genny as Bella: (*writhing on ground, jerking.) Ugh! I forgot to go cross eyed.

Genny as Carlisle: Stop it, Edward. You are killing her.

Genny as Edward: (*sucking her own wrist over dramatically, making gurgling sounds.)

My promise to you: A video of this later this week or early next week.

Sad fact: She's only seen it once and out acted Kristin Stewart...

Another fact, less sad: We haven't laughed this hard in a long time. I still have tears on my cheek.

Today I have...

- made homemade granola.

- made homemade granola bars.

- made homemade yogurt.

- talked to my mom, on her first day home since the extended hospitalization and therapy rehab.

- ground three pounds of nuts.

- gotten the garden ready to start.

- Gen's language arts and writing.

- Our fractions lesson.

- finalize paint colors.

- Facebook. (Wait... does that even count under the guise of productivity?)

- cleaned the kitchen. *

- finish bagging up Gen's clothes, to exchange. *

- Wii fit workout. *

- make fruit bars. *

- slice and freeze strawberries. *

- return phone calls and arrange a few meetings. *

- make a call about the clothing exchange. *

(* means I did it after posting this.)

But it's already 11:30 and I still have to:

- wash and hang out the living room throws.

- clean up the living room.

- pack away Gen's winter clothes.

- laundry.

- put together the summer toy bucket/tub.

- air up basketballs.

- make shortcakes.

For dinner:

- ham

- cheesy potatoes

- broiled lemon asparagus (Gen's favorite)

- strawberry shortcake

Things I haven't done:

- upload photos and recipes on the home website. (this is because our computer, not laptop, is ill.)

- print off curriculum stored on same, sick and sad computer.

- anything needing to be done on that computer. *sigh*

- get dressed. :(